3rd to 17th day of Eid

the price of life

1. a private hospital had to transfer a patient who had been brought to the hospital after a near-fatal road accident to a government hospital knowing that the patient needed immediate treatment.


2. transfering the road accident patient to a more affordable government hospital had to be carried out after the insurance company failed to respond to enquiry made on the patient's insurance policy.

if only one knew what tomorrow would be like

1. a husband and a father of six rode a motorbike to and from work every day without a license.


2. a home-maker and a mother of six did not know the pin number of her husband ATM card and did not even have a bank account .

underestimated legal terms

1. legally a bank cannot allow withdrawals of a customer's money without his or her consent. one cannot claim eligibility for his or her spouse's saving or pin number of ATM card even his or her spouse is in a coma.


2. legally an employer cannot transfer an employee's salary to his or her spouse's or any other person's account without the employee's consent.

Verily, His Command, when He intends a thing, is only that He says to it "Be!" - and it is! (V 36:82)

1. the road-accident patient was a staff member in my workplace and the accident happened on the third day of eid.


2. he sustained broken rib bones(second to the seventh), injured lung and liver (caused by the broken rib bones), broken-into-three thigh bone and fractured right temple skull.


3. his fractured skull was first treated followed by the broken rib bones. after the rib bones operation he got into a coma.


4. his wife was left with six kids to feed and bills to pay while he was in a coma. bank and employer were strictly on business terms.

good people still exist

• to all of you friends who have helped his wife and kids in one way or another, may Allah reward your good deeds.


• to the management team that has helped on different term, may Allah reward us all.

to Allah we belong and to Allah we shall return

• he passed away today in the icu room while his wife was repeating 'lailahaillallah' to his ear and one of us was reading the 'yasin'.


• may Allah forgive him and forgive us

Third Interview

We, he (my good friend), his wife (my good friend too) and I, were waiting for the storeowner to pack goods my couple-friends had selected outside a grocery store. I had somehow fallen oblivious (was not abnormal at all, my attention span is short that I always fall oblivious) in between listening to other customers exchanging words with the storeowner and my couple-friends grocery-talk. Suddenly he turned to me and said 'what kind of man is this guy?!!!'. I snapped out of my oblivousness and turned to look at a man walking towards us trailed by a woman who was holding a baby with her right hand and a grocery bag with her left hand. A physically healthy looking man with nothing in hands walking so fast forcing a woman (apparently his wife) with one precious life in one hand and whatever load in the other trudging in keeping pace with him was a degradation-to-man-dignity scene to me...that man was definitely mentally sick.

That is my introduction of my third interviewee who is also the first manfriend I chose for my interview. He and his wife have been my good friends for many years. The truth is I was kind of losing words in trying to describe him. I always believe only two women know a man better than any other he comes across in his lifetime. The two women are the mother and wife, which makes me an unqualified judge of character for any man. But the above story (true story) is not my only encounter of him showing his concerns of women - their safety, their need for protection, their tender heart, their fragile nature, their sensitivity - and he has not only shown his concerns with words but with actions as well.

All I could say is his mother and wife are blessed to have him.(side note: I also believe a good man is for a good mother and a good wife!)

Here is his first part of the interview...

Part 1

1. Question: Let us know a bit of your background…
   
   
   • name (you can be anonymous)
   
   Answer: anonymous
   
   
   • city of origin
   
   Answer: Kuala Terengganu
   
   
   • age
   
   Answer: 43
   
   
   • marital status
   
   Answer: married
   
   
   • occupation
   
   Answer: engineer
   
   
   • parents occupations
   
   Answer: farmers
   
   
   • the number of siblings you have
   
   Answer: 5
   
   
   • age of your siblings
   
   Answer: 60, 55, 49, 43, 34
   
   
   • age of your spouse
   
   Answer: 43
   
   
   • occupation of your spouse
   
   Answer: homemaker (since 8 years ago – she was an engineer prior to that)
   
   
   • the number of children you have
   
   Answer: 3
   
   
   • ages of your children
   
   Answer: 15, 14, 8
   
   
   
2. Question:Which school, primary and secondary, did you go to?


Answer:

• Primary - Sekolah Kebangsaan Bukit Payong, Kuala Terengganu
• Secondary – Sekolah Menengah Sultan Sulaiman, Kuala Terengganu



3. Question: How do you describe, being a student, in these schools, in terms of orientation – academic, social, religious and moral?


Answer:


• Academically - all exam-oriented, they taught me to study, memorize to pass exams.


• Socially – I was kind of reserved. Lacked self confidence feeling inadequate in every way as my mind was constantly preoccupied with the fact that i came from a poor family.


• Religiously/morally – when i was small i always followed what my parents taught me to do (frankly, i was indeed a good son then, obedient to my parents, and always respected the elderly). I completed reading the Quran at the age of ten and started praying seriously at the age of six. I have tried my level best and succeeded to a certain extent practicing these religious and moral values during my school days.



4. Question: How do you describe your achievement - social, academic, religious and moral, which you believe you had gained for being;
   
   • in school more than being at home, and
   • at home more than being in school?

Answer: I attributed my achievement to my being at home more than being in school (my answer to Question 3 tells). I thank Allah for directing my parents to nurture me with strong religious/moral values during my childhood – which was at home. I later on behaved well at school carrying the strong foundation of moral values such as to have respect for teachers and the elderly, to be neat and clean, to be considerate to friends and others,etc.
In conclusion my achievement in school were academic, social and religious (during my time in boarding school) and at home were religious and moral.


5. Question:How do you describe the role of your parents in your upbringing?


Answer: My parents had momentous role in my upbringing. Everything starts from home. One would carry the habit he or she has developed at home to the surrounding, no matter where he or she lands. Yes, my parents were 95% responsible for my upbringing while other surrounding factors such as school have 5% impact...(worth referring to my answers to question 2, 3, and 4).


6. Question:What are the things about school,from your school years to now, that you think:



1. have improved,

Answer: infrastructure, new/modern building, good labs, teachers to students ratio (now has gotten smaller with more teachers)


2. have not improved, and

Answer: classroom set-up, furniture, toilet cleanliness/general conditions


3. have gotten worse?

Answer: Education quality, grading mechanism (in general), moral values (of students and teachers alike), teachers' devotion, students' discipline....what else?


7. Question:How do you describe yourself;



1. before you met your wife,

Answer: reserved , timid, anti-social, and when girls were involved had low self-esteem.


2. while you were courting (if you were),

Answer: not so much different, maybe more confident and open to share ideas with girls (in general)


3. while you were engaged (if you were),

Answer: was worried –how i would perform my responsibilties as a head of a family to-be. I was doubtful whether my in-laws would accept me as I was ( a ‘kampung’ boy from a poor family, etc) and was uncertain whether my parents would get along with my in-laws with so many barriers in between (language, status, etc....)


4. first five years of marriage, and

Answer: it was very challenging – financially – as we were building the family basic needs from scratch. Housing, food, cars, kids need, etc...


5. from then (d) to now?

Answer: Wiser and more secure, stronger husband-wife relationship, better understanding and more appreciative of each other through ‘family-first’ attitude and parents/parents-in law sensitivity approach.


8. Question:What are the things you wish you had known and you think would have made your life easier knowing ahead than to discover them later?


Answer:

• People (the ones whom I put my trust in) who were two-faced and took advantage of my good-will attitude and trusting nature.



• Business environment which is full of corruption, bad practices, etc. Had I known, I would have not ventured into business. I did try to change the system but could not, was not accepted and eventually could not survive.


9. Question:How much have your siblings helped you in making important decisions in your life? Please elaborate.


Answer: My siblings have no influence over my making important decision in my life, e.g. getting married, choosing my spouse, quitting good jobs, etc – all i chose and decided myself without consulting them.


10. Question:How much have your friends helped you in making important decisions in your life? Please elaborate.


Answer: My friends have nothing to do with my making important decision in my life. It has always been my choices through my ‘istikharah’ with Allah (supplication asking for guidance from Allah).’

Iftar Log - Weight Change - My Heart

IFTAR LOG

Day 1
Mom’s home-cooked dishes at my parents’ place (no one beats my mom when it comes to making me eat like a super-active-girl-in-need-of-energy i was once )

Day 2
Eat-out snack-plate from KFC

Day 3
Ramadhan buffet at Mutiara Hotel

Day 4
Eat-in snack-plate at KFC

Day 5
Eat-out snack-plate from KFC

Day 6
Eat-out GCB meal from McD

Day 7
My favourite dishes at Asam Pedas (Hot Tangerine Soup) Restaurant

Day 8
Dishes from Iftar Stalls

Day 9
Eat-in ramadhan special meal at Pizza Hut

Day 10
Dishes from Iftar Stalls

Day 11
Eat-out GCB meal from McD

Day12
Dishes from Iftar Stall

Day 13
Dishes from a local eatery center (excuse me Mister! please be confirmed that i am to the root a very shy person (ignore what your eyes may tell you) ... trust me iftar-date or any kind of date for that matter does not work with me...the third person was your victim because i had threatened him with all kind of possible threats so that he was whole-heartedly forced to be my chaperone...(another story worth a post by itself)

Day 14
Ramadhan buffet at Tanjung Puteri Golf Resort

Day 15
Ramadhan buffet at Persada

Day 16
Ramadhan buffet at Thistle Hotel

Day 17
Ramadhan buffet at Pendarosa Golf Resort

Day 18
Arabic dishes from Iftar Stalls

Day 19
Eat-in value meal (chicken) at McD

Day 20
Ramadhan buffet at Prime City Hotel

Day 21
Eat-in value meal(double cheese burger)at McD

Day 22
Ramadhan buffet at Mutiara Hotel

Day 23
Ramadhan buffet at Tanjung Puteri Golf Resort

Day 24
Dishes from Iftar Stalls at my sister’s place

Day 25
Mom’s home-cooked dishes at my grandparent’s place

Day 26
Mom’s home-cooked dishes at my grandparent’s place

Day 27
Ramadhan buffet at Thistle Hotel

Day 28
Eat-out value-meal (double cheese burger) from McD

Day 29
Eat-out value-meal (double cheese burger) from McD

Day 30
Eat-out value-meal (double beef burger) from McD


WEIGHT CHANGE

so, being in constant fear of putting on unnecessary weight, how much weight change i eventually recorded at the end of this log? i LOST 2.5 kg...i guess what i had eaten not with my heart did not get registered on the scales...


MY HEART

to you two who were (and still are) twelve hours away, having iftar when i had my suhoor and had suhoor when i was having my iftar..my heart has been with you...only Allah has the means, make dua and hang on to it...my dua is for you...(you know who you are)...

malaysia on stamps - (2)

note: these cars are no longer in production.